Ah, the hospitals, eh .. full of strange things like bedpans and commodes and injections and pills and lots of people to look after you .. peoples to clean the ward and stop the infections and people to do the dinners and breakfasts and people to take you to the x rays.
I cannot let go though I haven't been around the wardies for a long time stuck in the bed unable to leave.
But Uncle John thinks I don't need the Freudians which was rather disappointing as I'd phoned up to find out if we could have joint analcysts together today.
The lemuure on the end of the phone didn't understand to start off with but I told her that we needed the Freudians and that I'd been reading up on it last night I had bedpans on the brain and Uncle John had the anal retentions and we needed analcysts. After reading some of Mr Freuds ideas I was sure things would soon get better.
He said if you have the analcysts you need to see a doctor. I said .. we need the analcysts that's the trouble we don't have them. I thought that you did.
He asked me to explain it all .. so I did. I didn't need to go to a doctor or a hostpital but to have past life regressions. It was hospitals which had given me bedpans on the brain because I couldn't let go.
So could I have analcysts please. I had heard that everyone wants this in America and you just talk about your life and then you can understand everything you do. I also explained that Uncle John needed it too as Mr Freud had said he did cause he collected things .. though I had to say that I thought Mr Freud might've been wrong there because everyone I knew collected something. Perhaps we could all come along at once though.
He said that the analcysts were private and confidential. Only one person a talking at a time then .. I thought maybe we could have a job lot as most of us would be there for the same thing .. well, all of us really as far as the collecting went.
The lemuure at the other end of the phone said could I call back tomorrow.
Then I pottered round to see Uncle John who said he didn't really think we needed to have the group regressions. I said that I had thought it rather strange that he was treating people for collecting cause everyone I knew collected something. Uncle John said he expected there was a very long waiting list for the collecting therapies because everyone would want to go. I had to say too that he didn't seem very interested in bedpans on the brain from what I'd read anyway but I had asked if they could fit the whole group in and I was going to phone back tomorrow to see what they said .. but, really I was starting to think that I was barking up the wrong tree.
So, we don't have a problem. I would tell the man tomorrow. Uncle John said that I just needed to forget about the bedpans however wonderful they and the hospital were.
So, I thought it best not to tell him about the colourful effects of the beet juice I'd just given him and pottered off home.
